Why do we crook our heads at stupid angles? Why do I look pregnant? Nachos is one answer.
Getting lost on your vacation
Here’s a travel tip, if you’re diving somewhere, you should probably know exactly how to get there. Especially in a foreign country. Especially when driving at night. Especially when it’s highly likely you and your spouse might not be speaking at the end of your journey. Next time I’ll screen shot maps. Or take a cab.
If something seems too good be to true, it probably is
When you see that ad on Hotwire for the $5 a day car rental, realize it probably won’t end up being that cheap. We were super proud of ourselves for scoring a car for 5-days sub $50. When I questioned the actual $350US price tag we were presented with at the rental shop, dude at Dollar Rental told me, “Only a fool would think they’d really be able to rent a car for $5 a day.” Um, yeah.
Getting sucked into the all you can drink
We haven’t stayed at an all-inclusive for a very long time. After not counting my drinks right (doubles count for two, not one!) one night and the huz getting swept up in Super Bowl the next, we realized there’s always a price to pay even when something is “free”.
Bring an appropriate book for F*&k sakes!
What kind of a loser packs non-fiction on their beach vacation? Guilty. This was a genuine error, not because I’m a nerd, but because I’m frazzled, leave packing till the last minute and am forgetful. I suppose I am a bit of a nerd, too. If I didn’t snap up a few celebrity gossip magazines at the airport, this vacay might’ve really sucked.
Spray tan fail
When you’re as pasty white as I am, there should be no shame in admitting you get a little help in the tanning department. I don’t go for tanning beds, but I lurve me a spray tan. The tan itself was expertly applied. Like with many things in life, the problem lay with user. To avoid that fine line between au naturel and orange, I showered after getting sprayed, vigorously towelled off and rubbed lotion into my skin like nobody’s business. Sadly, I missed my feet and I rubbed so hard, I stripped much of the golden glow off. Sigh.
No matter how delicious a snack you think it might be, no matter how hungover you are when heading to the airport, never, ever throw a banana into your carry-on bag next to your not quite shut laptop. Nuff said.
Have you made any recent vacation blunders? I’d love to know what they are, if only so I can feel better about myself!